Top Chef–ers Way Into the Idea of a Broadway Spinoff

We imagine it would look a lot like this, but with knives. Photo: Danielle Berman; Photos: Joan Marcus (Anything Goes), Patrick McMullan (Lakshmi), Neilson Barnard/Getty Images for FINCA (Colicchio), Valerie Macon/Getty Images (Vigneron)

At Wednesday's opening of Larry Kramers gut-wrenching The Normal Heart, Bravo's resident nut-counter Andy Cohen slipped us an interesting showbiz tip: Tom Colicchio has been pestering me to do Top Chef, The Musical!," Cohen told us. "He thinks he has a great idea about doing something like that I told him Im not so sure, but hes trying to convince me!" No word from camp Colicchio on the rumor, but we did grab a few reactions from former Top Cheffers, who say they'd join the production in a New York minute or at least throw one of their castmates into the onstage weeds.

Season five's Leah Cohen is totally in. "The Asian side of me obviously loves karaoke and singing so I would be into making a cameo," she said, offering just one caveat: "I must be wasted before I go onstage. Just kidding!" Who else does she think might be a good fit? "I think Carla has a good personality for a musical. Also Dale. And Marcel could spit a couple of lame raps as well.

Funny she should mention Marcel. When we asked him if he'd be up for a lead role, he basically took the job on the spot: "Totally, of course, I'd love to do it. I'm a pretty decent dancer, I'm not gonna lie. Actually, I was cutting a rug for six hours last night. Yeah, I could definitely handle the freestyle hip-hop scenes." But can he sing too? "I totally sing in the shower, but it should probably be Milli Vanillistyle, where I can just dance and lip-synch."

Any other chefs he'd want to see onstage? "I saw Angelo Sosa dance in the Bahamas and, let me tell you, that was something else. It was straight Euro-discotheque, eighties-style. It was like a sexy striptease with him pouring water all over himself. The D.J. actually stopped the music, it was that good." But the Top Chef talent doesn't stop there, "Dale is also a really good dancer, especially to Katy Perry."

Sam Talbot would support the show under one condition: "I would only see the show if they cast Padma as herself."

And season six's Eli Kirshtein wants the role of creative director. It would have to be really dramatic with a protagonist and villain," he says, doing his best Julie Taymor impression. "The challenges would involve cooking to get away from the super-villain, like guessing the allergy that kills them." He continued, "There would also have to be overt product placement musical numbers like one about the incredibly shiny Gladware plastic wrap while a Toyota Highlander drives across the stage." And that's not all! "Everyone would be on pulleys, like in Spider-man, and the villain would be wearing a Tom Colicchio mask throughout the show, and at the end he pulls off the mask and its actually him.